"P" -ness Envy

A few weeks ago, my good friend D was in town for a conference, and I was fortunate enough to get a few hours with her post-conference. We embarked on a mini-road trip to Grenada, Mississippi. Towards the end of our drive, D let out a small yelp, and said "Oh my God! I didn't tell you about discovering my p-ness."

I have known this woman long enough to know that if I just raised my eyebrows, she would likely clarify.

Seeing my brows and registering what she had just said, she burst out laughing and said "No no no, that came out wrong, I mean my inner p-ness."

"I think whatever you're trying to say is still coming out wrong," I said, suspecting she was probably not identifying herself as a hermaphrodite.

"Yeah yeah yeah, wait a minute, I just got so excited to tell you about this, I'll back up," she said quickly. "Have you ever taken a Myers-Briggs Type Indicator test?"

I was, in fact, familiar with the MBTI, a personality test that gauges "preferences" across four categories, each of which has two possible letters/types. For example: "Do you prefer to focus on the outer world or on your own inner world?" If you choose outer, you are Extroverted (E); if you choose inner, you are Introverted (I). Of course, the questions are asked far more comprehensively and far less obviously, but that's the basic gist. By the end of the test, you have your own specific letters across the four preferences; there are 16 different general "profiles" into which a person can fall.

"Well," said D, "For years I've tested as INFJ -- introverted, intuitive, feeling, judging. But I recently re-tested, and I'm on the cusp of J (judging) and P (perceiving). And since Js are supposed to be more organized and decision-oriented and I'm just not like that, I'm so thrilled to consider exploring my P-ness--"

At that point I requested that she begin referring to her "P-quality."

"Anyway," she said, "It's very liberating. You're totally a J, right? Because you're so organized and decisive--"

It was my turn to burst out laughing. "Organized? Decisive? Are you kidding?"

"Well," she said, "If that's the case, you hide your P.... quality really well."

P's, you see, are process-rather-than product, ideas more than implementation, leaving doors open rather than confidently selecting ... and while in my professional life, I can be product-implementation-decision focused, the truth is it's difficult for me... and for how many others? Apparently, I am a P in J's clothing. (We shall refer to this phenomenon as my PJ's.) I can fake people out and have them think I am a solid J.

But I know the truth. The ENFP (extroverted, intuitive, feeling, perceiving) label fits me well; it calls me out on several of my strengths and weaknesses:

ENFP
Warmly enthusiastic and imaginative. See life as full of possibilities. Make connections between events and information very quickly, and confidently proceed based on the patterns they see. Want a lot of affirmation from others, and readily give appreciation and support. Spontaneous and flexible, often rely on their ability to improvise and their verbal fluency.

What this brief cheery overview glosses over is the tendency of P's to have difficulty staying on track... and for all my alleged J-posturing, every once in awhile, I get so caught up on whatever else I have going on I get caught, for lack of a better phrase, with my "p"ants down. Like in this crazy time, when I've kept plates spinning at work, and taken on a few additional tasks - but neglected my blog. I "p"romise to re-engage in this site and apologize for the lapse.

(Due to the tardiness of this post, I briefly thought of titling it "Two Weeks Late Due to P-ness," and while I know that would have elicited a few chuckles, I just couldn't imagine that every reaction would be quite so jovial - and I myself would have turned bright red had someone else used that title - so it was quickly scrapped. Call it a well-played J decision.)